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A creative blog by Heidi Huber on The Whole 9

Heidi Huber started her career with the sink or swim theory. Luckily she knows the freestyle which has taken her from the Chicago stage to behind the scenes in Los Angeles where she currently continues to tap as The Whole 9’s Chief of Everything Else.

What the silliest thing you did as a kid to fit in?

Did you smoke cigarettes, make prank calls, or listen to music you didn’t necessarily like?  Back in “those days” when your security was in short supply, what silly things did you do just to fit in?

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My big brother was having a party on the sly while the parents were away so while everyone drank beer, booze and smoked, I ate the pretend ciggs i had and drank all the soda for the party. When the sugar high hit me i acted like i was drunk and knocked over peoples drinks …HA they all thought i got drunk !!!!

Put talcum powder on my face.

played on the sixth grade basketball team. i wrestled, and had no hoops skills whatsoever. i pretty much gathered fouls because i made it much more of a contact sport than it was. if you had the ball, i either took you down or slipped in a half-nelson.

When I was 13 tried to put a bleached streak in my hair using hydrogen peroxide and rubbing alcohol out of the family medicine cabinet. It was a hideous orange blonde and made my hair feel like straw. But, as with all things hair, it eventually grew out!

What’s one word that almost always makes you laugh?

Is it something silly like “flabbergasted” or “numpty”, or something that you think no one would really find funny that gets your belly laughs going?

What’s one word that almost always makes you laugh?

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I’m with poorgood — toot is a big blast in our house as is tootarooski, tooti rooti, and tooti scooti. Having gas was never so funny as it is when you have a four year old who loves to laugh and rhyme!

Being a 4 year old at heart, here a few that I actually use, though rarely with a straight face:
shenanigans, rigmarole, hootenanny, gobbledygook, snood, buggery, booger, bloviate, weenie, kumquat, eggcorn, nutsack, hubbub, ignoranus, kerfluffle, dingus, rectitude, pusillanimous, infundibulum…

What is the best part of the Super Bowl?

I haven’t been into the Super Bowl in many years, and we’re not even attending (nor hosting) any party for the Big Game.  Is it the commercials, the food, or simply the game itself?  Hey Sports Fans, what’s the best part of the Super Bowl?

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- if madonna starts to heavily make out with a chick

the seventh-inning stretch.

The Half Time Show — I still remember when Prince performed and did some amazing thing with shadows which inspired our shadow dancers at our annual nudes show :-) Hey Heidi…maybe better than live painting next Saturday?

@dangerousideas…GREAT ANSWER!!!

Are you comfortable in your body?

Tonight, The Whole 9 Gallery opens “The Human Touch”, unveiling the human form as seen through the eyes of one photographer and three painters from The Whole 9.com

There are some gorgeous and graceful bodies gracing these walls, I tell ya.  And while I wouldn’t deem myself worthy to pose for any of Hugh Hamilton’s underwater photos, I’m comfy in my body.

Are you comfortable in your body?

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My body and I get along quite well, most days. We’ve settled into each other comfortably over the years.

- we have a love ‘n hate relationship

Luckily we fit in each other pretty well (as the contrary sounds quite painful and likely dangerous). And although I may never be a ripped, 6′5 Olympic athlete with a face pretty as Brad Pitt, this good old body’s served me fairly well over the years, thank you very much.

In three words, how would you describe your country?

Is it “Home Sweet Home” or is it “Whoa Big Brother”?  Are you wrapping yourself in the flag or packing your bags?  Or are you too busy to answer because you are Occupying ___(insert city name here.)

When you think about your country, what three words best describe it?

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- UnUnited States of America

( i can only count to three )

underclass gonna rise.

I’ve recently traveled abroad and have had the opportunity to talk to no small number of people from several different Euro and Middle Eastern nations.
Many questions about the United States/ Americans came up from everyone but one opinion/statement surfaced time and again. And despite all the ills, woes, socioeconomic issues we face here I have to say that I now more than ever, TRULY agree with that universal statement from my overseas friends.

“It’s a Paradise.”

Full of wierdos

(some good, some bad.)

What the craziest Small World story you’ve got?

I continually say, “The world gets smaller and smaller.”  Once you’ve lived awhile, once you’ve lived and worked in a number of places, all of a sudden it’s like, “No way!  I went to school with Jen Ray!”  Crazy…

What the craziest Small World story you’ve got?

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- i was sitting in first class next to james brown on a fly to toronto; nice man, i but couldn’t understand a word he said.
p.s. he was a short person, does it count as a “small world” story?

I once went on the “SMALL WORLD” ride at Disneyland 5 times in a row.
Long story short, I was suffering from a back injury at the time and had been prescribed the muscle relaxant Flexeril.
Let’s just say that Flexeril’s effect on me was KRA-ZEE, to say the least.
Add in riding in that little boat and watching/hearing all those characters sing that song, well, I just couldn’t get enough and couldn’t stop laughing.
Yes. It’s a SMALL WORLD after all….
:)

that my wife and i spent a portion of our honeymoon in a remote and obscure resort of southern bali that a friend did.

What would make tomorrow the best day of your life?

This QOD suggestion comes from TW9’s own COE (Chief of Everything) Lisa Schultz.  Where does she find the time?  I’m sure thought of this when she was awake at 4 o’clock this morning…

Is it money or is it a soul mate?  A chance to visit with a family member or a an unexpected trip of a lifetime?  Or is it something less tangible…

What would make tomorrow the best day of your life?

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The fact that tomorrow will become Today. The Present…a Gift.

i could say world peace. sure. the obvious. but something else? something selfish and fun? winning the biggest state lottery ever awarded. i could do lots of good with that.

Being debt free and having enough money to have the proposal of my dreams and the wedding of hers.

Seeing the look on Tejan’s face when he sees Willow, our house, and knows that he’s finally home.

What’s one thing you knocked until you tried?

My first exposure to live Blues music was at Kingston Mines in Chicago.  Baa-BAA-ba-BUH!  God, I hated it.  From then on, I didn’t care what kind of Blues you played, I hated it.  Blanket the entire Blues genre!

In the band I’m in, we play some blues.  Yeah, that karma is a bitch, and I even sing one entire blues song by myself.  Sigh…but at least it’s not that Baa-BAA-ba-BUH crap.

What’s one thing you knocked until you tried?

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Being a parent. I never had any interest or desire, but now here I am realizing that it’s the best thing that ever happened to me.

The Harry Potter books. Just read them all for the first time this year. I never thought they’d be any good. Thought it was a lot of hype. Boy was I wrong! They are fantastic! Very regretful I didn’t read them years ago

believe it or not, there was a time when i knocked bob dylan. just couldn’t get past the voice. then someone gave me the basement tapes and demanded i give them an honest listen. now…..you gotta be kidding! tangled up in blue. buckets of rain. and never mind the lyrics; its the voice, dummy!

I can’t narrow it down to just one thing.
There’s an entire list waiting in the wings here.
As with most EVERYONE I know, my life has changed tremendously in the past 3-ish years.
All said and done, said changes have, mildly put, EXPANDED my world tremendously.
So many things, people and experiences I would have poo-poo’d (or hidden from) in the past are now of EXTREME interest to me.
It continues!!!!!

Red Wine.
I only drank white for the longest time.
Now Red is all I drink.

What’s your favorite impromptu moment?

On this day, January 30, 1969, The Beatles made their last public performance giving an impromptu concert on the rooftop of a London recording studio.  I love watching excerpts of this concert, the look, and the raw feel on a cold UK day with what still remains the most famous band of all time…

What’s your favorite impromptu moment?

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i was jogging along santa monica blvd in bev hills years ago. traffic was backed up to a standstill. then out of a car leaned rodney dangerfield and yelled ‘where the hell is everybody going?!’ it was great.

Seeing the look on Lisa’s face when she saw me at The Whole 9’s new office. And Heidi’s when she realized who I was. Priceless!!!

- while driving my hearse on the overpass of western ave. and the 10 freeway, a real funeral procession and motorcycle cops thought i was part of their funeral and they started to follow me.

i guess i did put the “fun” back in funeral, is that an impromptu moment?

There have been so many moments when my joyful, fun-loving, uninhibited 4 year old daughter sheds her clothes and rounds a corner into a room of people at our house yelling out “NaaaaaKED BaaaBY!!!!” The look of surprise on the face of the guests in my home is priceless ;-)

on tour driving through Utah last summer we saw Paul Mc Cartney in concert we got of the freeway hung in the parking lot then got in the concert.

what a vibe it was.

peace-in

What writers are under (and over) rated?

There are writers that have had a book leap to the top of the New York Times Best-Sellers List, I read the book, and sometimes I wonder what all the fuss is about…not much of the time, but sometimes.

Then there are writers like Leif Enger who writes poetry on each page of his novel, Peace Like a River.  You don’t know him?  It’s because he’s unknown and under-rated!

What writers do you feel are under or over-rated?

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i’m under-rated. haha. ann rice is over-rated. she had one good book. and i’ll get popped for this, and i love his one great book, but jack kerouac only did one . sorry folks. he is over rated. mark danielewski is rated high and should be. cormac mccarthy is rated high and should be.

- over: J. K. Rowling, Stephenie Meyer, A. Rice

– under: Stephen Elliott, Brian Sloan, André Aciman

– coolest: William S. Burroughs, Chuck Palahniuk, Charles Bukowski

Overrated: Steig Larsson, JK Rowling, Agatha Christie, Robert Ludlum, Dan Brown, James Michener, Gore Vidal…
Underrated: Norman Rush, Julian Barnes, De Bernieres, Thomas Disch, Anthony Burgess, Neal Stephenson…
Coolest: Phillip K. Dick, Robert Stone, Kem Nunn, John Fante, Pico Iyer…

Overrated: Steig Larsson
Underrated (and by that I mean, not as popular as I wish he were): Paul Auster