“Sometimes I dance/Sometimes I clown/But you can bet/You haven’t seen nothing yet/’Til you see me do/The James Brown!”
– James Brown, “There Was a Time”
It was on Christmas Day 2006 when James Brown — “Butane” James, the Godfather of Soul, the Hardest Working Man in Show Business, Mr. Dynamite, the Amazing Mr. “Please Please Please” himself, Soul Brother No. 1 – passed away in his home town of Georgia.
It was on one September day thirteen years ago when I had a chance meeting with the man in San Francisco. That day, I was getting over this horrible flu. I spent the whole morning sleeping, and I finally crawled out of bed around 1 p.m. Longing to get some fresh air, I walked to the bus stop, jumped on the California 1, and let Fate tell me where to go.
The bus dropped me off near the Grace Cathedral up on Nob Hill. I’ve never been in the cathedral before, so I decided to see what she’s all about. I saw the stained glass windows, walked the labyrinth, meditated in front of Keith Haring’s statue, “The Life of Christ.”
Before heading out of there, I needed to use the bathroom, but the facilities were all locked up. So I hurried across the park to the Fairmont Hotel. I walked through the hotel’s lobby and entered the men’s room. As I was standing in front of the urinal, I caught a bit of conversation from the two fellows pissing behind me. They were talking about dancing. I figured one was a dancer and the other was interested in dancing.
As the two guys walked over the sink to wash their hands, I finished my business, flushed the toilet, zipped up my fly, and turned to see a 50ish, bald white guy talking to the one and only James Brown. You could easily tell it was “Butane” James — that nicely pressed suit, that solid black hair, that face as black as midnight, and that big Cheshire Cat smile.
I shouted out loud, “OH MY GOD, IT’S JAMES BROWN!” The Godfather turned to me, smiled, nodded and winked. He finished up his conversation with Baldy and took off.
Still stunned, I asked the bald man, “Oh my god, was that James Brown?”
“Yeah,” said Baldy. “You know, I was pissing here and he came in next to me. When I spotted him, I said, ‘Hey, I like your dance moves. How can you do that at your age?’ And he said, ‘How can I dance at my age? I’ll tell you how. It’s because I never played sports in my life. No football, no baseball, no nothing. So if you want to dance like James Brown, don’t play any sports.’”
After I heard that, I jetted out of the bathroom, hoping to catch the Godfather and see if he could pass on some words of wisdom to me. I walked down the lobby hall, and there he was in the gift shop, flirting with two young cashiers. I smiled, whispered “aw screw it” to myself, and walked away.
Now in San Francisco, I’ve seen Sharon Stone down on Fillmore Street (she looks like every other blonde on Fillmore), Robin Williams in Green Apple Bookstore, and the great poet Lawrence Ferlinghetti in North Beach (hell, he owns the whole place!). But I’ve never met anyone like James Brown.
If I encounter all the kings and queens in the world, even if God came down to earth, I would probably muster out an unenthusiastic “hi” or something. But with James Brown, I was near speechless, like a bumbling idiot.
Why? Just listen to the double-timed “Think” from his first Live at the Apollo (the best live document of any performer ever recorded) or the nine-minute call-and-response version of “There Was a Time” from his Live at the Apollo, Vol. 2 and see if your hips don’t move. I swear, the second the drumstick hits the snare, you’ll be dancing as if you never played sports in your life.
“You gotta live for yourself/Yourself and nobody else!”
So who was the most famous person you’ve ever met?